Sunday, November 30, 2008

Why Being Sick Sucks: An Experiment

STIMULUS: "Hi, I have brought you some cookies!"
HEALTHY RESPONSE: "Thanks!"
SICK RESPONSE: "Aughhhghh"

STIMULUS: "Would you like to have sex? I am very attractive!"
HEALTHY RESPONSE: "Sure! Climb on top."
SICK RESPONSE: "Awuuuoghhhhoahhh"

STIMULUS: "We're going to Las Vegas for some questionable adventures. Want to come?"
HEALTHY RESPONSE: "Wow! And I just finished saving up my gambling nest egg!"
SICK RESPONSE: "Ohhwoooohhaughhhhuhhh"

STIMULUS: "Oh man, you look flush. Are you sick?"
HEALTHY RESPONSE: "Nope! I have just done some awesome drugs!"
SICK RESPONSE: "Ugghhhawwwoooooahhooowoowohhahhhaaaaaupphhhhhhag"

CONCLUSION: Being sick sucks.

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