Since the days of the ancient Greeks at least, people have been trying to unlock the mysteries of the universe using philosophy, logical thought, and rational consideration. The field of philosophy has been growing and maturing for thousands of years, but shows no signs of stopping. Even today there are dozens of philosophers at the top of their field, continually putting forth new arguments and disproving old ones. I don't really know many of the names of top philosophers who are still alive, for the most part their names are a great hidden mystery to all. However, I had the once-in-a-lifetime chance to sit down with great modern philosopher William Clifford (no relation to the 19th-century mathematician, he assures us) to discuss several of the most important topics in the field today.
The Quest: Hello, and thank you for agreeing to sit down with me today. I know you have a very busy schedule.
William Clifford: No problem, it's cool.
Q: I've read all your works, and I have to say I'm a huge fan.
WC: Hey, thanks.
Q: So let's get down to brass tacks. The field of philosophy is so wide and fast-moving. What are the big topics to keep an eye on?
WC: Funny that you should mention, really. One of the most heated debates going on in the literature now has to do with "brass tacks." I was sitting around one day and thought the big question: what if everyone except me is a robot? The topic is now hotly debated.
Q: Where do you stand on the robot issue?
WC: It's certainly not disprovable.
Q: What does that have to do with brass tacks?
WC: The most intelligent of us philosophers are moving past the "what if" and on to the "how." Simply enough, how do you think those robots are held together? It ain't silly string.
Q: What would you consider your first philosophical awakening?
WC: I was watching the Matrix, and after the movie ended and we were walking out of the theater, I thought, like, whoa: what if the Matrix is real? What if we're just, like, in this matrix, right? And the whole world is just a computer simulation!
Q: What are some of the major arguments on this topic?
WC: I consider myself a major Wachowskian, the summary of our arguments being "it could totally be true." However, there is a small opposition who call themselves Hobbesians... er... Calvinists. It's pretty much the same argument but without the robots.
Q: Modern philosophy seems to be very robot-centered. Is this an accurate depiction?
WC: Well, robots are one of the cornerstones of the new world of third-millenium argument. They're such a new phenomenon that there hasn't really been time for them to be adequately discussed. I would definitely recommend that anyone interested in philosophy check out some works by the father of modern philosopy, Isaac Asimov. He posits the three Laws of Robotics which form the backbone of most legitimate rational thought.
Q: I hear you're writing a book. What is it about?
WC: My new book is going to head in an entirely new direction, and I hope the field will follow. Simply put, I read Fahrenheit 451 and watched Idiocracy and the gears started turning. It's not obvious, but if you look really closely at these works you can see some parallels to modern society and government. My book seeks to extrapolate on these similarities and put them into a logical argument.
Q: Do you expect your book to have real-world effects?
WC: Only time will tell. Hopefully governments will wise up and start listening to philosophers. In one of my papers I put forth the idea of a "philosopher president" who either is a philosopher or at least listens to philosophers. That was the paper that put me on the map, really. Nobody had ever read anything like it.
Q: On that topic, you've long been a proponent of bringing philosophy to the masses. How do you hope to achieve this?
WC: We've already made great headway in this area. People of all walks of life can choose the t-shirt that says "God is dead - Nietzsche" or the t-shirt that says "Nietzsche is dead - God." Bringing such high-level debate to anyone simply able to read is a great advancement and gives me hope that there will be even better philosophers in the future. However, today you don't even need to read to enjoy philosophy. Right now in the works is a television show that I'm involved in called "If You Don't Watch This Show, Is It Still On?" where two other top level philosophers and I sit around and debate exclusively that point, three nights a week. Catch it on primetime soon. Of course, we're only building on the legacy of great philosophy-driven films and television shows such as Children of Men and Battlestar Galactica.
Q: So would you say it's an exciting time to be a philosopher?
WC: Oh, definitely. Even besides all the stuff I've been talking about, there are lively and important discussions like "is your red the same as my red?" and "science: good or bad?" We're really making a lot of headway. I invite everyone who can to come along.
Q: That's great to hear. Thank you very much for your time, William.
WC: Please, call me Clifford. You're welcome.
Philosopher William Clifford, affectionately known as "Bobby," has written three term papers on philosophy, did a seventh grade book report on 1984 by George Orwell, and his "On Halo: Secrets to Winning through Cognitive Awareness" is a top view on GameFAQs.