MAN DOG & WOMAN DOG

MAN-DOG RETURNS
WOOF WOOF comin’ at you from all sides, bringing a fuckin’ A GAME. You got to be tellin’ them crazy broads trying to show you UP. You ain’t gotta take any of that shit because you a MAN DOG hot shit MAN DOG WOOF WOOF.

Ladies all tryin’ to be all “hey you are not so hot in fact you SUCK” but you gotta put them right. You gotta be all checkin’ into a high price hotel and lookin’ out your window and yellin’ all “HEY YOU AIN’T GOT SHIT ON ME WOOF WOOF” then you pull out your DOG SALAMI and be all rubbin it up against the window bein’ all “HEY THIS WINDOW PRETTIER THAN YOU” and then the lady snaps her fingers ‘cuz she just got SHOWN.

Another way to show a crazy broad who be steppin’ on your god damn GAME god shit god DAMN be a MAN DOG is to get a stool and climb up on the table and take off your shirt and flex your crazy big muscles and then she is all “damn I did not know muscles could be that big” and then she gets up on the stool and she is ready to do some CRAZY POUNDING but then you push her off and she falls on the ground and you are like I am a GOD DAMN shit CRAZY fuck HOT damn MAN DOG DON’T STEP and then she is like daaaaang.

So basically you gotta be rememberin’ all this and then people everywhere gonna be all “damn that is the guy who is not afraid to show the ladies who try to be all crazy on him, I am going to go over to him and have some CRAZY POUNDING” and then you be like “hell yeah WOOF WOOF.”


WOMAN-DOG DEBUTS


WOOF WOOF It is time for you to be all stickin’ to your guns HOT CHICAS because it is time for a little lesson on how to keep off those fuckin’ men tryin’ to cop in on your LADY JUSTICE.

First you gotta get up, you gotta get up and you gotta look in the mirror and you say to yourself “GOD DAMN IF I AIN’T THE FINEST CHICA IN THE FUCKING WORLD LOOK AT THOSE CHEEKBONES I GOT CHEEKBONES LIKE A SAMURAI SWORD BECAUSE THEY CUT THINGS AND ARE WELL PLACED” then start rubbin’ your hands all over your cheekbones and men be all breakin’ down your door tryin’ to get at you and they say please and thank you like a nice man HOT DAMN.

NEXT you gotta walk down the street and you see a dollar on the ground and you pick it up and say “hey who left this dollar here” and everybody around you go all “shit this lady be all generous and kind, returning things that do not belong to her” and then you are having sex with them on the street and people pass you by and you say WHAT and they don’t know shit because you are BOBBING WITH A HOT ONE NEAR THE SIDEWALK.

And then sometimes you gotta dole out the LADY JUSTICE so you walk into a place, you walk right in and you go “hey what does a lady have to do around here to get some god damn mother FUCK holy SHIT service?” and when they say to wait a minute you just pull out a stereo and start dancin’ and kick their desk and they are like “stop kicking my desk” but you don’t stop because you are HARD CORE STYLE WOOF WOOF.